Deck the jails with bouts of folly! Each year, the holiday season seems to bring out extreme behaviors in various revelers. Often, such behavior takes the form of heightened warmth, charity, and good cheer. Alas, then there are other “extreme” examples — like the following.
Colorado Couple Steals Neighbors’ Christmas Decorations, Puts Them in Own Yard
In the style of Homer Simpson and Ned Flanders, married Colorado Springs couple Carrie Carley, 42, and Jeremy Lewallen, 18, helped themselves to pieces from their neighbors outdoor holiday displays and set them up in their own yard. Carley said that after her teenage husband would take walks around the neighborhood, “there was just more stuff in the yard.” The light-pinching lovebirds’ haul totaled more than $2,000, which qualified the couple to face felony theft charges.
[New York Daily News]
GPS-Equipped Baby Jesus Stolen From Nativity, Found Face Down on Teen’s Carpet
While many of us have used a “Find Your Phone” feature to locate a lost wireless device, a community center in Wellington, Florida, was able to track down a stolen nativity scene figure that was equipped with a GPS device. The procedure may as well have been termed “Find Your Baby Jesus.” The ceramic figure — into which GPS was installed following a previous theft — turned up face down on the carpet of a local teenage girl. The life-size sculpture was handcrafted in Italy and valued at $1,800, which turned an intended prank into a serious theft charge.
Caught on Camera: Fiend Stabs Inflatable Frosty the Snowman
After Missouri homeowner Jeff Diggs set up a giant-size, blow-up snowman in his front yard, free-wheeling slashers pulled up in a car, hopped out, and shanked Frosty into a limp heap of vinyl. A security camera caught the plastic-piercing assault. Diggs posted then video on YouTube, where he noted: “Frosty received a total of 9 stitches from the stabbing. He is doing well and recovering from his injury. He insisted on going back to work immediately because he believes in the magic of the holiday season and hopes that all people will come together and learn to love and respect each other regardless of our differences!” [CrimeFeed]
Australian Bikini Bandits Steal Christmas Lights
Early one morning in South Johnstone, Australia (population: 500), a quartet of bikini-clad females ran wild through the small town’s holiday lawn displays and made off with approximately 30 solar lights. A local man chased the women off and could only describe them as sporting skimpy swimwear. Senior Constable Megan Denning said, “It’s definitely the first one that I’ve come across where this is the only description we do have. But I guess it’s the type of description that someone might know.” [UPI]
Georgia Man Shotguns Mistletoe Near Mall
While holiday revelers traditionally kiss while standing underneath a mounted sprig of mistletoe, William Robinson, 66, aimed to gather his own Christmas foliage by using the kiss of hot lead. Robinson reportedly fired a shotgun into trees containing mistletoe, in hope of knocking the plants to the ground so he could bring them home. The main issue is that the trees were in the direct vicinity of the North DeKalb Mall, a major shopping center in the suburbs of Atlanta. Robinson spent a night in jail, and added, “I did get out just in time for the party, but I didn’t have the mistletoe to take. So I went without the mistletoe.” [ABC News]
Zombie Nativity Scene Vandalized, Owner Vows to Protect Undead Figures
Jason Dixon of Sycamore Township, Ohio, first erected a “zombie nativity scene” on his front lawn in 2014. Immediately, unhappy people let their thoughts be known about the monstrous, life-size figures. The following year, the town itself took Dixon to court over zoning laws — and the town lost. Most recently, someone trashed the nativity, ripping the undead Virgin Mary’s head off, and flipping the fang-bearing Baby Jesus onto the grass. Dixon simply repaired the decorations and pledged to keep them in place, noting, “If they burn it down, we’ll rebuild it.” [CrimeFeed]
Main photo: Pixabay